3.07.2012

Feeling Accomplished

There are some systems that suggest that when you have a task list, you should prioritize and do the most important tasks first. Or the hardest task first. Well, that might be effective...for somebody. It doesn't work at all for me.

I'm a habitual lister and I'm also easily distracted. I'm usually doing too many things at once, so the lists actually help me to remember what I've done and what I need to do. Then I cross things off as I go along and I begin to see the list dwindling down and lots of spaces between items (because I list in my Blakkberry). That makes me happy. What works best for me is writing my list the night before and attacking the easiest items as soon as I get out of bed. By the time I've crossed 5 small things off my list, I'm on a roll. I'm feeling good about myself and about my progress. I'm excited about all the stuff I've done already and oddly enough it gives me energy as opposed to just making me feel like I've been working all morning. If I start a difficult task early in the day and it takes 4 hours, when those 4 hours are up, I feel like I can't do anything else. I'm tired. I'm annoyed. So, when I have big things like that, I may not get to as much in a day. It's odd, but whatever. It works.

I gave my list the business today! Only 1 task left. Could have done it, but I decided to blog instead. Lukky you!

P.S. I finished one shoe. Decided, after looking at it for a while, that I don't like it. I will be starting over from the beginning. Yay!! -__-

3.04.2012

2 Things I Learned While Not Painting...Aha!

I'm bakk. Still working on the shoes. I say I'm about 35% done. I'm STILL not sure how I feel about them, but I'm going to rokk them anyway. I've already pikked an outfit and everything. I'm excited. To finish something. To finally be done with these shoes. To have something new to wear. That's plenty. I'm also hungry, but that's for a different blog. Anyway, while I'm waiting on side one of shoe one to dry, I figured I'd write a blog. I've learned two big things (so far) during my hiatus this past month.

Thing 1: I can't be a housewife. I was thinking, "I could do that. I could be a housewife." Spend my days taking care of home. That's what I do anyway. Especially now, considering mommy's not able to help much anymore. But, up until recently, I always had my work too. Man, when I made a decision to stop painting, although indefinitely, tomorrow suddenly became very boring. I didn't have anything to look forward to BUT laundry and dishes. Cleaning and bills. Mommy doesn't even have her weekly doctor's visits anymore, which completely ended my weekly date with self. Womp and double womp. I didn't realize how much substance work was adding to my life. So, I've resolved to be a working housewife. Ha! Now...I just need a husband. :o)

Thing 2: I had aha moment. As mentioned, repeatedly, I've been some sort of miserable since I haven't been painting. And when I'd post it people would say "well, just go paint." But I had resolved not to do that, so I could take care of home. I was putting everything before what my mind/body/heart was telling me to do. GO PAINT! Granted some things couldn't wait, but most of them could. I hadn't really considered it until now, how much I'd put it on the bakkburner...for laundry. For grocery shopping. For dinner. For anything else that was important. But everybody that has a 9-5 still grocery shops. They still cook dinner. They still do laundry. They probably don't sleep much, and I do...but still. Why is it that I felt I couldn't do both? I was treating my profession like a hobby. Damn.

That blew my mind. I am so ashamed. I get so offended when other people act like it's a hobby...like I just do this for fun, when that's the way I've been treating it. Not that I don't respect my work, it's just that I'm always finding something more "important." If I didn't have an order, painting had to wait. It was me taking advantage of myself, the flexibility of working from home and being my own boss. I think the fact that I enjoy painting made it easier for me to do that. I was feeling like I was sacrificing something that made me happy to do some things that I needed to do. Something that I considered work. Like if it's fun, it doesn't count. Silly, silly SYM. *shakes head at self*

Well, now that I realized that, I'm going to do better. No, I'm not opening the store again. Not yet. I still have to prioritize and I can't fully commit to both. I can, however, commit to making time to create. To give my work the respect it deserves. To put it on the list of things that MUST BE DONE, whether I'm bombarded with orders or have time to simply work on something new. It makes me happy. It keeps me even.  It pays the bills. It supports my family. I can't stay away. And that's the way it always should have always been. This is not a hobby. It just happens to be a job I like to show up to.